Dopamine

Ahh, this wave of exhaustion just took over me. That's probably what happens when you wear glasses that make you look hot but are just slightly too strong for you. And also don't eat. And are leftover high, and had not the worst shit of your life but a pretty bad one at 10:30 am and re-hydrate after it with coffee.

Been running on that and two pieces of toast with a laughing cow each spread on them, almost 5 PM now. This instant Vietnamese coffee might end up turning into the taste of this anorexia relapse if this anorexia relapse turns into an anorexia relapse. It was Harney & Son's "Paris Tea" at the start of my ED, and Starbucks' Pumpkin Spice Latte last year. Which I actually got to try a flavor-ally lukewarm version of yesterday...

Unless...my body and brain are literally relapsing, but I haven't acknowledged it as a relapse despite relapsing. I don't even know what I'm talking about anymore. I'll continue this once I get to another computer because I'm receiving a strange but vivid vision of Sofya looking at my fast typing ass weird despite receiving no input from my nervous system that she's noticed it at all. Fun! At least the glasses and perceived weight loss from my not-relapse look good. And please save my draft, Dreamwidth.

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